Luke's misplaced thoughts

[Soloman Tump]

Theres a nomadic guy who lives out on Dartmoor, he sets up bluetooth speakers around stone circles and makes ritual drone sounds with a small solar powered modular synth and a gong. I hope one day I bump into him and experience his sounds.

[banned]

slept forever and still f exhausted.

[banned]

I have noticed that, despite only small errors, and whatever their intent, everyone I have been involved with has ended up making me feel 'ghosted'. I guess I blame schizophrenia, which is my problem, no-one else's, but it's frustrating to spend basically my entire adult life unsure what happened. I wonder what would've happened to me if my ex had phoned back the next day like she promised.

[banned]

Theres a nomadic guy who lives out on Dartmoor, he sets up bluetooth speakers around stone circles and makes ritual drone sounds with a small solar powered modular synth and a gong. I hope one day I bump into him and experience his sounds.

hahah is that a metaphor?

I did some volunteer work for a lady who was writing a book on local famous trees, and she talked to me about some of the homeless people who lived in the woods around Oxford. doesn't happen anymore, not for any length of time. we have local weirdos who look like old time homeless people, hunch back and stick etc., but in reality they are just eccentrics.

[banned]

no-one's really ever gonna do anything to help me be OK. such is schizophrenia: you get ignored and have to adapt to that as best you can. it's one person's life, so whatever; though it happens to be mine

[banned]

* swamp

you do not have less obligations to someone cos they have a severe life long mental illness: everyone can fuck off! lol

[banned]

ima internet date... swipe right/left all that.

I have no expectations except moving on from my imagainry stalker

[banned]

who is SEERIOUSLY underestimating me if she thinks for a MOMENT that I won't be able to see beyond their looks and wealth to see an ACTUAL PERSON who DOESN'T TREAT ME LIKE TRASH lol

[banned]

no, your cheekbones aren't gonna hide your lack of personality forever

leave me the fuck alone: I don't give a fuck about norms of any kinda

[banned]

lol
> I am feeling both suicidal panic and quite happy
>> not heard that before...